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Title: funny ass poems


Zergling - July 13, 2005 05:58 AM (GMT)
got these from dtrades for those who know what it is
laughed my ass off when i first read them



there once was a guy named eugene
who built a masturbation machine
but the damn thing broke
on the fourteenth stroke
and whipped his balls to a cream

old mother hubbard went to her cubbard
to fetch her poor dog a bone
but when she bent over, rover took over
and gave her a bone of his own

jack sprat could eat no fat,
his wife could eat no lean.
so jack ignored her flabby tits,
and liked her asshole clean.

twinkle twinkle little star,
how i wonder what you are.
shine upon the parking lot,
as i eat my girlfreinds twat.

little bo peep,
fucked a sheep,
blew a horse,
licked its feet.
she ate his as so very nice,
tounged his balls not once but twice.

little boy blew,
he needed the money.

rock a by baby,
o the tree top.
your mothers a whore,
i ain't your pop.

little miss muffet,
sat on her tuffet,
eating her curds and whey.
along came a spider,
who sat down beside her,
and said "hey, whats in the bowl bitch?"

peter peter pumpkin eater,
had a wife,
loved to beat her,
smacked her twice across the head,
fucked her ass and went to bed.

hey diddle diddle,
the cat and the fiddle,
the cow jumped over da moon.
thats more then my lazy wife does,
that fat fuckin smelly baboon.

three blind mice,
see how they run,
where the fuck are they goin?

peter peter pumpkin eater,
knew a chick but couldnt meet her.
met your dad one fine day,
sucked his dick and now he's gay.

jack and jill went up the hill,
each with a buck and a quater.
jill came down with two fifty,
that fuckin whore.

jack be nimble jack be qwick,
jack burt off his fucking dick.

mary mary quit contrary,
shave that pussy its so damn hairy

Ashley - July 13, 2005 01:12 PM (GMT)
Shitty and unfunny.

How old are you, again, 8?

This stuff is pathetic. Shitty rhymes don't turn this garbage into anything that even ressembles poetry. If stuff that rhymes and talks about penises amuses you so much, here's one for you:

Zergling/Aeglos has a butt buddy,
With which he always agrees,

To Beren, one day, he said,
"Last night my asshole bled,
So quit being rude in bed,
Or I'll stop giving you head,
Give my anal orifice some time to grow,
So we can finally have sex like big, flaming homos,

They do bad things in channel Gay,
Aeglos and his buddy Jay,

The morale of this story,
Is that making bad rhymes is easy,
But you can't just call the result poetry,
Because we both know it's plain shitty,

So just avoid pissing on art,
It only shows everyone you're a retard


By the way...

QUOTE
Self-creation only


Call that an excuse for banning some of the trash, Debo?

Debonair - July 13, 2005 05:18 PM (GMT)
LOL that was good, Ash. XD

Those are some pretty fucking bad limmericks, I must admit, but they have to be like that. I actually have a whole book of poetry just like the ones Aeg posted.


Anyway, it's partially my fault since there is no real other place to post this. I'll make a Literature Dump later today.

Beren - July 16, 2005 09:25 AM (GMT)
Mmm I have to admit.. that was pretty good.. :o

Normaly.. I would make a comeback that would make you look like dirt, similiar to every other time you tried to insult me in your life. But... thinking of how long you spent putting those sentences together to rhyme.. discourages me from wasting my time just so everyone can get a good laugh at your expense.

Oh.. and im sorry you feel I stole your bestest best friend.. I know you and aeglos used to be close :( I guess he just woke up and realised you were a bitch and a total waste of time... :o wait a minute.. isnt it such a quinkiedink we both did at the same time! I mean how cool is that!?

... Anyways keep up the good work.. from what ive heard, you've lost a lot of cool friends in the last couple months! :D



p.s. remember... clean your box.. dont be like ashley :(

Ashley - July 17, 2005 05:56 AM (GMT)
QUOTE (Beren @ Jul 16 2005, 09:25 AM)
Mmm I have to admit.. that was pretty good..  :o

Normaly.. I would make a comeback that would make you look like dirt, similiar to every other time you tried to insult me in your life.  But... thinking of how long you spent putting those sentences together to rhyme.. discourages me from wasting my time just so everyone can get a good laugh at your expense.

Oh.. and im sorry you feel I stole your bestest best friend.. I know you and aeglos used to be close  :(  I guess he just woke up and realised you were a bitch and a total waste of time...  :o  wait a minute.. isnt it such a quinkiedink we both did at the same time!  I mean how cool is that!?

... Anyways keep up the good work.. from what ive heard, you've lost a lot of cool friends in the last couple months!  :D



p.s.  remember... clean your box.. dont be like ashley  :(

#1: It didn't even take me 5 minutes: that's what happens when you're not a retard in the first place.

#2: Actually, in the f list category, I got upward more than anything. And whatever I removed was garbage I'm glad I got rid of. But I presume that what's shit to me is gold to you, miserable scum... :rolleyes:

Beren - July 17, 2005 06:03 AM (GMT)
Still... 5 minutes is quite a waste of time just to spend on attempting to insult someone.

Well if what you say is true... wouldnt that mean it works both ways? Hence my shit would become your treasure? If so.. I can totaly agree with that.. cause everything I've thrown away in the last 2 years of knowing you, you've taken in. From personality changes, words and phrases, and most of all.. yourself :lol:

Demon-Renegade - July 31, 2005 09:19 AM (GMT)
Wait.. If I'm being shit who do I belong to? ;\
Can I be like... A penguins or something.. Penguins and bears and cats are awesome..

Beren - July 31, 2005 06:55 PM (GMT)
I totaly agree.. Penguin shit would own :o




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